What came first was a CEO decided he wanted a new holiday home and a 5m raise.

Your MamaSystem

There are more hydrogen atoms in a single molecule of water than there are stars in the entire solar system.

holy shit you barbarians.

What’s clearing leave? Is that an American concept?

Is it me or is mozilla kinda turning into a cunt lately

They shrunk their breakfast sausage product line and focus on grass fed meats.

Exciting. What do you plan to spend your $2 on?

The dr is allowed to make you wait as long as he needs to, but if you’re ten minutes late for the appointment they reserve the right to cancel it and change you.

Lingy with baked beans. Cut each bite and eat with fork. Run each bite in the bean slurry.

I’m very excited about the disk defragmentation tool being added and the new grocery shopping price comparator matrix. This is a fantastic ereader.

Thanks pal. The phosphoric acid in the soda burnt my asshole. Now I cant wipe at all.

Better: Bless the meat, damn the skin, open your kisser and cram it in.

No. If it isnt worth reading now then it isn’t worth reading

Most public bathroom tissue is exactly one molecule thick.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR SKEEZIX.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.

Floorp is made by 3 guys in a basement. Dont count on it being around.

Dont feel bad, the smartest kid in our school now pumps gas.

Maybe they shouldn’t.

The statements are both true. Also, the best way to get someone to accomplish something is to tell them it can’t be done.