Sure, “nice” needs some definition.

But that’s your call. I’m asking you if you are a nice person.

  • THCDenton@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    I’m nice to service workers. I am not nice to people on the freeway. Take from that what you will.

  • SuiXi3D@fedia.io
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    7 days ago

    Depends. I default to being friendly, but I’m not good at it. I’m a terrible conversationalist, and what is logical to me (from my perspective) often gets misconstrued as being an asshole. It’s never my intention, but I’m awful at reading people too. I just never really took the time to learn how to… people.

  • BougieBirdie@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    6 days ago

    A lot of people in this thread appear to be pretty hard on themselves. There seems to be a trend of people who want to be nice, are trying to be nice, but don’t see themselves as nice. If that sounds like you, then I’ve got some good news for you:

    You are a nice person.

    If you’re sincerely making the effort to be a better person then that’s admirable. Self improvement is hard. Too often people are quick to judge based on the result of your actions rather than the effort that’s put into them. To put it another way, we judge people by their actions but judge ourselves by our intentions.

    Treat yourself to the niceness that you’re trying to show to other people. You’re doing the best you can. You’re trying to be a nicer person which means you’re trying to grow. From tiny seedlings grow mighty oaks, and the seedling shouldn’t be shamed for starting its journey. Rather, it should be encouraged to keep growing.

    If you find it difficult to be nice, but you’re trying to be a nice person, I’d say that’s a lot nicer than being the person who dismisses another for not being ‘nice’ enough.

  • Doxatek@mander.xyz
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    6 days ago

    Nice to a fault. I think it’s because I try to be the person I always wish I would have had access to because I’ve never really had any support from anyone.

    • TheFriar@lemm.ee
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      6 days ago

      I, the same way. I’m in a pretty outspoken city, but I’m a bit more of a just give in and avoid having to yell at people person. I can get upset and yell when need be, but I don’t employ that tactic unless I lose my cool. Otherwise, I’m overly amenable and very much of the mindset “they’re probably having a tough day” or “it’s not really worth it/this doesn’t really affect me more than my slight disappointment.” And then I just get over it. Or sometimes I’ll think more about it later and wish I acted differently, but right now I can’t really think of a time where that happened, so did it really matter in the long run that I didn’t push harder for myself?

      This is all ironic because my face doesn’t usually seem like the face of a nicer person. I grew up with rbf, mainly because I spent my teen years very angry about everything.

  • NauticalNoodle@lemmy.ml
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    6 days ago

    Kind. I try to be a kind person. Sometimes I fail. Too many people argue the being “nice” is merely a superficial term.

  • businessfish@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    6 days ago

    i want and try to be but i don’t succeed every day. i hate thinking about those times when i don’t succeed, but being mindful of those times is a big part of what i can do to succeed more often.

  • inconspicuouscolon@lemy.lol
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    5 days ago

    I am very nice. I could probably be kinder, but I think if I was I’d be letting myself get walked on and stuff, so I don’t think it’s all that good to be too polite.

  • Ptsf@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    I’d say I’m optimistic, hopeful, and we’ll intentioned but it’s been many a year since I’ve felt “nice”. Something shifted in society during the Covid era and I just feel awful going out of my way for most people these days. Very much in the “every person for themselves” category.

  • JareeZy@feddit.de
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    6 days ago

    No. I know people who are genuinely nice, and I don’t compare to that. I am, for the most part, trying to be a very relaxed person though, and my benign apathy has sometimes been described as “nice”.

  • Hanrahan@slrpnk.net
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    7 days ago

    No… In my defence…

    “Nice people made the best Nazis. My mom grew up next to them. They got along, refused to make waves, looked the other way when things got ugly and focused on happier things than “politics.” They were lovely people who turned their heads as their neighbors were dragged away. You know who weren’t nice people? Resisters.”– Naomi Shulman

    • CoggyMcFee@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      I think this is where the specific definition of “nice” is crucial. I think it’s very possible to still be “nice” while also being confrontational or standing up for things, and in fact, doing it nicely but without backing down can sometimes be extremely effective.

      I know the “nice” you are referring to, where someone uses it as a shield for uncaring, selfish behavior. I’d of course rather have someone who isn’t so “nice” who earnestly tries to do the right thing than that kind of nice.

  • Clbull@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    75%. I have my moments, plus it’s hard to stay nice when there are so many assholes in the world.